Achoo!

This morning I woke up and the inside of my head was burning and my nose was running like a faucet...what the hell? I normally have really bad allergies but for some reason, this year I had nothing...until now. Turns out the mold count is high which makes sense as it's been raining a lot this past month. It also makes sense because we've had a dry summer...damn it!

I thought I was home free.

So here I am pretty miserable and hoping this doesn't turn into a sinus infection. Fucking allergens.

I watched Amelie yesterday, one of my favorite movies, and cried like a baby. I needed it. It's a French movie (go figure) and it's about a shy girl that decides to anonymously perform acts of kindness for the people in her community...at the end she learns to face her fears and dare to love. My favorite line from the movie was "Your bones are not made of glass, you can take life's bumps, now go after him!" Those were the English subtitles anyway. The lines were spoken by Amelie's neighbor who suffers from a rare condition in which his bones become brittle like glass and he's confined to his apartment where all the furniture is padded.

I love that movie and I love the soundtrack even more.

So last night, after eating supper, washing the dishes, and having a good cry, I read some poetry by Emily Dickenson and then went to bed. I'm proud of myself...I really am. This has been one of the most difficult times in my life but I've managed to function well. If I can function through this than I can overcome whatever other obstacles life puts in my way. Some day, I'll love again, and it may or may not last but I've resolved to love with my whole heart. Half assing love is not good, and it's one of many mistakes I don't intend to repeat.