I don't think I can do it...

Doin' Jack Shit Log: Day 5

I'm eating a big bowl of brown rice with soy milk, cinnamon, and agave...my hippie-I-have-a-gluten-sensitivity-and-seriously-need-more-fiber-don't-judge-me-biatchas breakfast...oh, and an apple tambien.

Tomorrow's my last day off on this long glorious string of days off...I don't know if I can go back...I won't! I WON'T GO BACK! But, I will.

So, I've been chatting with these guys online for a while now...let's call them Twing 1 and Twing 2...what? What did I say? No new guys on gay.com? Girl, you crazy, I don't know what you talkin' 'bout. She crazeh.

So, I actually met Twing 1 yesterday. He's cute but kinda goofy with a slight lisp and he has an extra old pair of chuck taylors like me. Total points for him. What? No, he doesn't have an old pair of granny boots also, bitch.

Sorry for the crazy dialogue but I miss the lunch crew so I have to fill in. It's how I cope.

As I was saying...We met for coffee yesterday and walked around San Pedro park...very nice. And, tonight he's coming over for dinner. I wonder if he's a good kisser.

Twing 2...recently broke up with his boyfriend a month ago...What? You're having deja vu? Why are you laying your head down on the table? Whateva.

So, he keeps asking me to come over late at night to "snuggle". But, I've never gone. There's a couple of things that are suspect.

1. He changed his Facebook status from "single" to "In a relationship, it's complicated"...sounds complicated to me...I asked him about it and he said the following, "I had to do it or my ex wouldn't have come to the intervention" INTERVENTION! What? I don't know where the sign is. Yes, I'll make one later and stop calling me Elizabeth.

2. Why does he want me to come over only late at night...and why doesn't he want to meet for coffee or something first. I think his boyfriend is gone for the day when he sends me those "snuggle calls".

Anyway, we made plans for tomorrow AFTERNOON and when I texted him this morning to confirm he said the following, "It would have to be late tonight". Hijole, ya me canse! Not to mention, I think his boyfriend or ex or whatever the case may be is a homocidal, twinkish, loser with a drug problem.

Oh yeah! You'll never guess... What? You were talking? Where are you going? Come back!